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The No-Clue Person

By Dee Peel

Last weekend, my daughter, Brown-eyed Girl, and Daughter-in-law, Peppermint Patty, were talking about how long we waited to have sex with our husbands. Single-but-seeking Brown-eyed Girl said “he has to put a ring on it first!” My other daughter, Health Nut, waited until her wedding night. Which led to their next question…Mom? My two daughters knew I started having sex very young, but Peppermint Patty thought I was a goody-church-girl 36 years ago and was surprised when I said “our first date”!

As a Life Coach, I begin the process of determining a client’s purpose with a Self-Assessment that includes four types of person. Today we’ll talk about The No-Clue Person, which I was 36 years ago.

Dr. Katie Brazelton, founder of Life Purpose Coaching Centers International, describes the No Clue Person as saying, “I’m confused about what God wants me to do with the rest of my life. It’s a fog to me. I just don’t get it.” This lack of purpose can cause a person to seek random activities to attempt to counteract boredom and the sometimes empty feeling of not having anything exciting to live for. This person has difficulty understanding that our wise God has assigned him/her current tasks (including spiritual growth) that are, presently, far more important than any big mission in the future. This person is sometimes on the brink of losing hope because of trouble understanding how the day-to-day grind matters in the broader scheme of fulfilling one’s purpose.

My purpose 36 years ago was to earn money and find love. I only knew one way to find love…physically.

Beginning our relationship that way meant when that faded, what then? That struggle lasted many years throughout our marriage which nearly collapsed. As I grew spiritually, healed past hurts and connected to Jesus in a way I never did with a human, I was available for a real relationship with Super Dad. That changed everything! He said my kisses were softer. Wow! What had they been before?

My spiritual growth also opened my heart, eyes and ears to listen to the small voice in my soul. I hadn’t seen past myself to know there was a voice. The counselor from within had a direction determined for me and was patient and waiting for me to catch up.

When I did my assessment, I realized I had been each of the four persons at different points of my life. As we grow, change and find a reason to live and love, we do become someone else…better, happier, healthier. Someone who can be available to others.

Have you ever been The No-Clue Person? Are you now? Comment below or email me at

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